Family-Based Youth Ministry

Shay and I have been reading through a book together called Family-Based Youth Ministry by Mark DeVries. The premise of the book is that parents have such a large impact on the life of their kids that they should be more involved in their kids lives both during church and at home. I love my job and I love working with students but I know that I can only have so much of an impact on the lives of students because I only see them for a small portion of the week.

Parents have to take responsibility for their own children's spiritual growth. I know that I am not a parent yet so I can not give advice based on my own personal life but this book has great ideas that parents can implement to aid in their child's spiritual growth.

DeVries says, "We can find the primary cause of the current crisis in youth ministry in the ways that our culture and our churches have systematically isolated young people from the very relationships that are most likely to lead them to maturity. Granting our children the 'privilege of being left alone' has served, in part, to create a wholesale epidemic of adult neglect of the next generation."

Students need their parents to be there for them. They do not need to be "left alone". The biggest need of our young people today is to be taught how to be an adult by an adult. Peer to peer relationships are important while in middle and high school but the only way that a child will learn to be a productive adult is to be shown how to be one by one.

DeVries cites the results of a study by the National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse and says that teens are significantly less likely to be addicted to drugs and alcohol if their parents:

1. Are engaged in their teens' lives, including helping with homework or attending extracurricular activities.
2. Have at least five sit-down meals together weekly.
3. Attend religious services together with their teens.
4. Set curfews.
5. Teach their children that drugs and alcohol are dangerous and morally wrong.

These are not things that are hard to do. Parents have to make their kids a priority over their work and own personal lives if they want them to fall deeply in love with Jesus Christ. This should be the goal of every parent who claims to be a Christian.

Again, I know that I am not a parent myself but it is clear that children who have meaningful relationships with their parents are at a much lower risk of engaging in risky behavior.